testimony four . (hold tightly)

I'm a keep holding onto your hand, your hand, yeah I'm a keep holding onto your hand Your hand Why you have to leave so damn early? You could've told me or something And now I have to write this song, just to prove that I'm not wrong But I still am at the end of the day, yeah Now I'm here with a bullet thinking I'm bulletproof Thinking I'll meet you soon but no You told dad to "let you go" I wasn't even in the damn room, I would've never said "yes" And that's selfish, always thinking of myself I wouldn't have this, nonsense anymore Thinking about the things I would've said if she have never met the lord I would've hated myself even more And I hate that I'm still here I promised myself protection and I steered away I feel injected with a virus that I feared, for awhile now Looking up in the clouds like "mom come down please" Please, can save You save Me from these bad thieves? Taking and ripping my memories And I'm talking about the good ones mom I remember when you used to hug me mom I felt the tears coming down from all the hurt from you mom I still hear every yell and cry from you mom You felt captive but God has sent an angle to me mom Where's he at now, haven't seen him in awhile no? I'ma keep holding onto your hand, your hand, yeah I'ma keep holding onto your hand (Yeah) Your hand I need a moment to digest, I haven't Grieved since Nah never I wanted this to be so cleaver but it feels like cleaver is cutting me up inside I feel, man I ain't even say that much I guarantee that I drop a bunch of names at once But everyone just scattered away as soon as she passed I wanted to say exactly what I think of them now? What do they think of me now, (Yeah) (Yeah) What do they think of me now? (Yeah, Yeah) (Oh no, what do they think of me now? (Yeah) I'ma keep holding onto your name, your name I'm a keep holding onto your name Your name, yeah (It was you're fault in the first place) Just Shut up man! How many times have I rebuked in Jesus's name? I had to stop church cause I was filling sick of you man And now I'm here at the alter getting rid a fake that I call this state of mind Can I please get the time? I can't even get no time, yeah And I'm back in a booth, telling people what they should do When I ain't even focused on myself (Yeah) Double standards to high for top shelf Give me a reason not to use your name just for the bail But there's no bail for for the hell that I was stuck in Me and Axia had to keep em' guessing No telling if we getting yelled or kicked out that day Still praying everyday that we would get out okay I need a moment just to focus on my thoughts, never knew I would give thanks to a knock on my door (Yeah) That's a "wonder why?", Jesus Christ came and saved my life, came and saved this little boy I was considered soft, always giving thanks to the wrong people This ain't nothing simple or equal Nah, it was never like that from the get go, yeah I'ma keep holding onto your hand, your hand, yeah I'ma keep holding onto your hand Your hand [04:49.55] I'ma keep holding onto your hand, your hand, yeah I'ma keep holding onto your hand Your hand