After the Drugs (Demo)

Why am I still so unhappy I'm off that shit Should be glad I'm not feeling much for life I'm tired should just take a nap I sleep alot more More than I use too And my nightmares have mostly relaxed The trees are starting to change colors But I still feel sad It's really isolating Wanting to be so alone I don't expect life changing It's all just a cycle till gone Still wish there was more to my feelings Than the feeling of numb But I'm fine 'Cause I'm sober My life isn't over I'll smile again In a while with friends And we'll drink and we'll laugh I'll swear was a blast I closed my eyes for an hour today I prayed to a god I didn't believe I closed my eyes for an hour today Prayed to a God I didn't believe I called my mom but I knew she wouldn't answer We're not talking lately Stood in the mirror to gain some perspective Soaked up alot of self degradation But I'm fine 'Cause I'm sober My life isn't over I'll smile again In a while with friends And we'll drink and we'll laugh I'll swear was a blast But by 1 am I'll be alone in my house Crying to ghosts of my past It's done I'm not having fun Addiction has lost But my mental instability has won I'm afraid of the dark Can't do life on my own Change makes me anxious I'm dancing alone The lights in the room They all flicker (Reminding me that I hate what I did to all of you) But I'm fine 'Cause I'm sober My life isn't over I'll smile again In a while with friends And we'll drink and we'll laugh I'll swear was a blast But by 1 am I'll be alone in my house Crying to ghosts of my past For a second I start to remember My old house In my room All the drugs I'd consume My body it misses the chaos My son And my sister My ex who stayed cheating My mom, swear she hates me My best friend My dad, still can't talk about that (Can't talk about that) And I laugh 'Cause of these thoughts I know They don't last And I'm back to the numb I was at Guess it's better than the drugs in the past The nights pills were all that I had But I'm fine 'Cause I'm sober My life isn't over I'll smile again In a while with friends And we'll drink and we'll laugh I'll swear was a blast