Forever Numb

When will I no longer have to feel? Disassembled to the core A grieving broken man In darkness I will shine Reborn a broken man My reflection laughs at me A cold and withered man Tormented by my past Too much to comprehend When I need a fix I itch and start to shake (shake shake) Uncontrollably this habit I can't seem to break A lucid nightmare From which I cannot wake (wake up) My eyes deceive my mind Can't discern what's real or fake Stormin early in the morning My mind won't let me sleep I'm sippin on my Mana' I'm bout half a handle deep I'm counting shots and bars While you be counting sheep All the swallowers I want 'em The spitters you can keep Pussy Every - Every Everyday this life been harder Ever since I lost my daughter I try my best to stay afloat but I'd rather be underwater Let me drown Don't attempt to bring me back up to the surface With her gone I feel so worthless And like now I have no purpose Deep hatred burns inside I can't comprehend why They took you from my side Without a chance to say goodbye It cuts me open wide In agony I reside Pain that is perennial One which will not subside I remember the call Like it was yesterday Tears filled my eyes I screamed in silence Couldn't reach out to Tay Straight filled with disbelief Still can't accept it's real Forever numb & yearning for the day I no longer have to feel