Finding Balance

Finding balance, I knew it'd be a challenge I knew it was a long road, but I've been loosing traction I worry 'bout the outcome, like will it really happen? Or am I just another waste of talent? I've been Looking for options, money is not a problem now I've been getting offers but all I do is to turn them down I'm hearing some bullshit, people say I've changed But the truth is I am me but I just have a bigger range I'm dying for motivation, keeping my concentration I'm facing all of these issues, looking for medication Or maybe it's meditation, anyway I can manage It's better to keep dreaming than to loose it when you had it, so Whatever happens I wanna let you know I'd rather die a hero than to sell my soul For a penny, I got many, I don't need them All I need is something that I can believe in, now what is that? Trying so hard but I'm fed up And if I fall down, I will get up And I try my best to keep my head up But I don't think it is that easy, no Fake my feelings every time I smile And I have done it for a thousand times Everything is trapped in my mind I don't know what I'll find, if I look inside Finding balance, I'll figure it out Am I suppose do make it happen for a bigger amount? Or am I lost in the money? Is my passion all gone? Do I have people around me to correct all my wrongs? I wonder Cuz lately I've been on a different path I'm snapping off at my girl, she don't deserve all of that That's why I hide in my corner, until it all disappears Cuz I am scared if I move, then I will meet all my fears And I try my best to smile, even if it's for a while I promise I will be better but it's gonna take some time, so For the moment, I put my feelings aside And focus on getting better for everyone by my side I wish that I didn't feel this way But now I do, so I wrote this so you can feel my pain I hope you do, so if it doesn't work out, if everything went away Than I promise you, that I'll be okay, I'm just finding my balance Trying so hard but I'm fed up And if I fall down, I will get up And I try my best to keep my head up But I don't think it is that easy, no Fake my feelings every time I smile And I have done it for a thousand times Everything is trapped in my mind I don't know what I'll find, if I look inside