Impact

The Christmas lights on my ceiling Help distract me from dealing With the childlike feelings The nightly dark keeps on revealing And I don't believe in god but I'm twelve again kneeling On a pillow begging for a way to start the healing Cause I never left that bedroom with those all white walls The door opens to a cliffside and I just can't fall Cause my bones can't take the impact, I grew too tall Too fast yet I'm still considered small Read a twelfth grade level at age ten It helped distract from all that was happening Everybody moved on but I'm stuck back then With the death threats, the police checks, and asking when This god I don't believe in will start my healing I can't stay on my knees but for this I'm kneeling Cause I never left that bedroom with those all white walls The door opens to a cliffside and I just can't fall Cause my bones can't take the impact, I grew too tall Too fast yet I'm still considered small I wanted the world, impossible to satiate How is it early birds always learn to run late Is the worm a reward or was it bait Either way it makes you easier to hate I swear to god they set me up for this fate Saying "kid you'll go far at this rate" Then letting them rip into all that I create And letting me stunt my growth at five foot eight My bones can't take the impact I grew too tall too fast Yet I'm still considered Small