Giant With A Napoleon Complex

Feelings are a luxury not all of us are entitled to Some only have anger, frustration and paranoia That will do My insanity protects my life It is here to make me ignore That I suffer horrendously until I'm no more It always was how this is going to be I can be but proud of my tolerance of pain But for how long? It's clear this cannot last How long until my ability consumes me inside? How much do I have left until I'm too far gone? It's more than likely I already am And just cannot tell the difference Truly only one thing really scares me Being too weak to live long enough I still remember before this, before the damage was done Since I was a child I've felt the change Lying awake at night, feeling my mind twisting to a knot I wait to see which gives first, sanity or life