This Is Begging

I still gnaw at my cuticles too much Nervous habits bred from adolescent touch Had Jade have stayed I might be a little less anxious And full of a lot more love My soul used to swell to twice its size But then my uncle died And at his funeral, it was said That his life didn't matter unless Jesus was at his side And that's a lie This is begging This is forgiveness This is wondering just where the hell have I been? This is all my joy thrown down This is my fear drawn out This is me talking to God now The Bible never spoke to me like it was supposed to Went to youth group just to find someone to get close to And I pretended to hear a message in that upscale living room Surrounded by strangers who never knew my view This is begging This is forgiveness This is wondering just where the hell have I been? This is all my joy thrown down This is my fear drawn out This is me talking to God now Am I wrong to feel this alone? Am I strong enough to earn this body that I'm loaned? Am I wrong to feel this alone? Am I wrong? It's alright It's alright It's alright