Greta the Goblin

We found her sitting in a pile of bones Deep inside the crystal cave Rusty armor and her club of stone And a tendency to misbehave Cleans her teeth with a lockpick A dagger to do her nails A fashion sense of dungeon gothic And affinity for ales It feels like we were meant to fight This tiny greenish dame But it simply don't feel right So we asked her for her name Set down her club and read the room Not sensing a vendetta A voice rang out through the tomb Its uh It's Greta Greta Yeah, Greta the goblin You just made that up Did you just make that up Listen, just play the game alright Greta the Goblin Greta the Goblin A rogue at three foot three Greta the Goblin Greta the Goblin Our favorite NPC Master of the underdark A regular reveling matriarch Queen of her trash domain Best highlight of the campaign A character with no plan But always gets the upper hand She's got the guts and wants the glory Absolutely no backstory I don't think there ever was A plan for her to join But if you can distract the guards She'll steal a little coin You need to bust into a hall Well, friend say no more Just roll her up into a ball and bowl her through the doggy door Pocket raccoon with a knife And grabby little hands She'll light a fire or two or three And load her pouch with contraband Maid of pandemonium Hellraiser night and day If you ask the party who's the best Here is what they'll all say Greta the Goblin Greta the Goblin A rogue at three foot three Greta the Goblin Greta the Goblin Our favorite NPC Master of the underdark A regular reveling matriarch Queen of her trash domain Best highlight of the campaign A character with no plan But always gets the upper hand She's got the guts and wants the glory Absolutely no backstory Greta the Goblin