Slightly Drunk

Well I came home, slightly drunk again My wife was waiting screaming, where the hell you've been I said I tried but I didn't get far I lost my keys, hell, I lost my car That's what happens when I'm out with my friends I come home slightly drunk again My wife, she fights just like Mohammed Ali She took a swing, and knocked the life out of me But I was out, before I came in And I'll admit, i don't remember a thing That's what happens when I'm out with my friends I come home slightly drunk again My wife she tells me that my life is a waste Well that's a matter of a personal taste She says she loves me but she's had enough Well I said baby, that's kinda rough Cause I aint got no plans to give up the beer She took my keys but not the John Deere And she can go ahead and sell the car But I don't care, I got this old guitar The frets are buzzy but it still can bend And I'll I come home slightly drunk again Don't me this this, don't give me that I'm tired of listening to that ratty tat tat If you love me and you really care Pour us a tall one and just grab a chair She took my money, yes she thinks it's funny That I've been sleeping at the local pub She might be laughing, I'm not really bragging But I like drinking beer and eating subs There's a lesson that I had to learn Touch the flame and you'll get burned You don't have to live like a monk When you can live, slightly drunk