emotional chaos

Summer Break, done nothing but sleeping Watching people on the internet breathing Seems like everyone's having fun but me Wanna make music, got no connections Doing it all by myself but suck at lyrics Will my dreams ever come true? Can't concentrate my life's messed up Parents fighting i don't wanna wake up Stuck in this routine of avoiding contact I'm scared and tired at the same time But acting like everything is fine I wanna be alone but not lonely I worry too much but i also don't care Life is just too much to bear I don't wanna get stuck in an emotional chaos My motivation fades away Wish i could force it to stay What the hell is wrong with me? I'm afraid to go to therapy I am my biggest enemy When are dreams becoming reality? Can't concentrate my life's messed up Parents fighting i don't wanna wake up Stuck in this routine of avoiding contact I'm scared and tired at the same time But acting like everything is fine I wanna be alone but not lonely I worry too much but i also don't care Life is just too much to bear I don't wanna get stuck in an emotional chaos