Confused illusions

Don't tell me that love is not a selfish way Of telling people that they make you feel okay Don't tell me there's a way to trust everything you say Don't tell me it's not okay to hope tomorrow will be a better day Don't tell me that you're gonna stay Don't lie to me, everything must fade away Life taught me lessons there's no way I can repay Her for showing me I'm alone anyway And when I feel bad I eat and I gain weight It's the only way for me to make real all my fears, all my pain And I would love to sit down and watch you while you paint An image of us lying on the grass with the warm weather of May I go to bed, tomorrow is Monday I hate it, but is it worse than when I force myself to enjoy going out on Saturday I walk hours and hours by night, I watch people sleeping on the subway I'm not allowed to cry there's always worse than what I consider as a bad day And I fantasize On going back to when I was a little child Everything was easy then I didn't need to think of where all my anger would end What if under this heavy rain I couldn't take you home What if I vanished and you were left here walking all alone You'd try to move me but my brain is made of stone I'd remain silent even if I loved you to the bone And we'd start running behind all these memories that were thrown Over the bridge that connects the life we would want to the life we have known And I would hear you praying to be caught up in this cyclone Just so you don't need to start one on your own And I fantasize On going back to when I was a little child Everything was easy then I didn't need to think of where all my anger would end And I fantasize On going back to when I was a little child Everything was easy then I didn't need to think of where all my anger would end