Heroin

I guess this is being a functional human being Suffocating fundamental feeling I need Starving main arteries of oxygen And the part of me that ever wants to let you in Tying tighter tourniquets around our broken hearts Fighting never to admit my world is falling apart They say my life has just started but I've never felt so dead Like the light inside departed only memories in my head Stronger and faster but no longer that sure In oncoming chapters, what's hunger running after Fighting in a war I don't think I can win Trying to ignore what's living in my skin Where all my innocence has been instilled with sin In a head on collision with a person that I've never been I'm no heroine character, and there are no heroes out there Who aren't very scared I need something real just to carry on 'Cuz I can't really feel without your heroin Trying to hide I'm scared but always aware It's just a front for everyone And the person in the mirror I've been searching for that missing person quite a while It's written in these verses and behind fake smiles Hidden right in plain sight, hitting on my off side Perpetuating lies, didn't want to face the light How come the wrong thing's the only thing that feels right I don't want to regret when I reach the end of my life Honest if I could erase my mistakes, I might rewrite or efface all this fate Maybe rewind to the very same day that I entered this life Or when I lost my faith Fear somewhere along the way that I lost that soul Now I don't really know where I left myself I'm a shadow I'm a shell of someone else I can scream I can yell but words don't come out when I say God up in heaven know that I need Your help 'cuz I'm no heroine character and there are no heroes out there Who aren't very scared I need something real just to carry on 'Cuz I can't really feel without your heroin I didn't come this far so that I could let go, didn't fight so hard to roll over no Wish the voices in my head would just leave me alone, but they won't Faced with a choice and so I choice Say I'm the sad dark type, yeah you got that part right Been fighting rising rides for nearly all my life And holding burning breath, but it's finally turning time And the when they bury the dead I'm taking back what's mine I would use you like a drug just to make the spinning stop And now I can't feel a thing And on the other side nothing feels right Is this all that's left for me I'm no heroine character and there are no heroes out there Who aren't very scared I need something real just to carry on 'Cuz I can't really feel without your heroin I had it all, you took that away Destroyed my soul that once could still be saved I didn't know that you would ruin me for all eternity I had it all, you took that away, Destroyed my soul that once could still be saved I didn't know that you would ruin me For all eternity