ANXIETY (feat. Mavah)

I'm not mean I'm just unstable in my head Rather than hurt you, I'd prefer to be fucking dead My anxiety constantly fills me with dread I didn't realize all I needed was by my side in my bed Now I can't even find slumber in my queen-sized bed Tonight to me my queen is quite simply, dead All of my messages, all of my snapchats left on read About a week ago not a single tear drop would have been shed And now all I long for is just a tiny bit of head I overthought everything, everything that was ahead I didn't realize I had my everything sleeping right by my side I had my ride or die I know that now thanks to my meds I threw it all away for friends I threw it all away for bands I threw it all away for bitches that don't want a man Yeah, I threw it all away for a couple of side bitches I threw it all away for some unsure future And now I'm watching your life as a movie in which I don't feature Spying on your life like a sappy loser Like the lame alter ego of the wall crawler I'm like Peter Parker, without the cool powers As a kid I wanted to live wild like Alex Rider Today I wish I could time-travel, make things right To the future or the past, I don't know, both don't seem bright If I could go back I wouldn't go to Rome I'd take the yellow brick road heading home And if I saw myself I'd probably shoot, yeah Sitting on a throne that I've built of soot and bones Getting rid of begats and begones But try not to mess up space time equilibrium Ey, f*ck, I think it's already begun My ADHD's playing tricks on me My thoughts are getting blurry My medication makes me numb, dumb Forgotten why I wanted to write this song Now I spend my evening, days or nights, in my room All alone, like a buffoon Oh who would ever want something to do with such a loon Ey Cavey Yeah, yeah