Confidence

What a curse it has been Change only come with the turbulent winds And I'm drained trying to run with these versions within Now the aim's to become one person again So I work with a pen Trying to discover myself with every word that I bend I'm picking apart the pieces to purge and prevent The possible pandemonium of those that prefer to pretend Placing my faith in my craft Leave my soul saved on the track just in case I collapse Patient, relaxed I blaze through the maze of these unamazing lazy days of rap But what if I can't change the fact I'm lame or wack Is Mac just an angry hack I'm hanging back Forget this whole thang but rap's A lit wick and I just want to be the candle wax Is there enough space left To bleed my heart and soul for one paycheck But even when I leave still my lungs make breath Through the beats and albums made best Most think I still won't make it but same say yes And for that, I done stayed blessed I will not be the eventual memory of an unpaid vet Whose lyricism once slayed death What if I fall off and can't get back on What if I never find where I went wrong What if I fail and it's too much to take It might just break all my confidence What if I fall off and can't get back on What if I never know where I went wrong What if I fail and it's too much to take I might just lose all my confidence Are my efforts in vain Should I lay the mic down or step up my game So many levels of pressure mess with my brain Stress and in pain, yes But the question remains Am I willing to walk away from whatever happens Without waking wrecked and waiting to hop on the wonder wagon I guess time will tell Won't be living in the past tense, whine or dwell I'm alive and well Grind like hell until I die or I'm shining There really ain't no other choice that I can find and I keep close to those I know I can confide in And master my flow like my soul was Poseidon So tell me is it destiny that's testing me To fight until I rest in peace Or is the quest a piece Of a puzzle that helps me see My true self and that love is the recipe From dawn to the dusk I'm on until I'm dust Leave it all to my family Stay strong cuz I must While I ponder and trust All the forces I cannot see Never say never I treasure whatever Endeavors that better me Write songs from the gut Until I'm only a memory Is there enough space left To bleed my heart and soul for one paycheck But even when I leave still my lungs make breath Through the beats and albums made best Most think I still won't make it but same say yes And for that, I done stayed blessed I will not be the eventual memory of an unpaid vet Whose lyricism once slayed death What if I fall off and can't get back on What if I never find where I went wrong What if I fail and it's too much to take It might just break all my confidence What if I fall off and can't get back on What if I never know where I went wrong What if I fail and it's too much to take I might just lose all my confidence