old habits

Lately it's been kinda hard to keep my head high I could try smokin' on sativa just to get that head high Don't know why it's a struggle just to get by 'Cause I've been anxious don't know where this road will take us It's just this isolation I've been feeling all alone If I didn't reach out to people then who would call my phone So it's been hard to feel like anybody cares when nobody's there They all say that they're near, I cry for help but no one hears I love all my peers and I want to let 'em know it But it's been hard for me to show it when I don't know my emotions I'm trying to believe that I'm not a burden But I can't stop reminiscing of when I used to flourish I want to be a good person but old habits die hard It feels like I'm reverting to who I was from the start It makes you feel like all that growth you did was for nothing It's to the point where I'm scared of the person that I'm becoming I take one step forward and I take two back I try to get up but my ankle snapped, where's my angel at? But I gotta keep moving But to be honest I just don't know what I'm doing I take one step forward and I take two back I try to get up but my ankle snapped, where's my angel at? But I gotta keep moving But to be honest I just don't know what I'm doing My grades suffer, I just want to be a good son to my mother And I've been trying to pull myself out of the gutter But it's a struggle just to get out of bed in the first place Someone hit me up and asked what I'm doing for my birthday And I paused, cause I was planning on watching movies After that go to sleep and do the same old routine So I took a second and I thought about it But I don't really got the strength right now to talk about it I almost wanna decline but I changed my mind He asked how I'm doing and I told him that I'm fine Now you know that's a lie but it's hard enough to open up I ask for help but when a door opens I close it shut So if I snap at you it ain't because I'm mad at you I'm just in a crabby mood which might give me an attitude But I know that that's not an excuse but, trust me imma come back And I got you in my corner dawg you know I love that I take one step forward and I take two back I try to get up but my ankle snapped, where's my angel at? But I gotta keep moving But to be honest I just don't know what I'm doing I take one step forward and I take two back I try to get up but my ankle snapped, where's my angel at? But I gotta keep moving But to be honest I just don't know what I'm doing