Wonder

I think it's time to step aside and let it go My feelings got to a point where they are too cold to show I think it's pride that's telling me I should man up and leave But I can not put all those tricks back on my sleeve no more Is this really me Or am I faking everything Just for the sake of putting one girl over anything I just don't wish for you to hate me over anything I'm writing songs but all these songs don't change a single thing And now it's me myself and I the only ones to hate I see you walking with that dress and I can't tolerate The thoughts of me and you going to prom but as a date Getting a call from mom dad asking why am I out so late I'm bleeding my feelings in this beat tell me do you like the sound A lake of tears I see myself I wanna jump and drown You know I see you every time I go down to your town I don't want to but that just happens when I drive around I wonder if this is me I wonder if you miss me I wonder who you call everytime that you wanna diss me I wonder who you love with the same passion you loved disney I wonder would you take the chances even if they're risky I wonder who am I after what I did to you I wonder who am I after what that did to me I wonder how the things are going with me and you I wonder if you thought a single time if it was meant be I don't want the answers but tell me why you ain't the same You took a path that wasn't good but who am I to blame You were a candle I was the one who lit up the flame You started shining bright right when I started becoming rain My heart is beating fast These feelings never last This pain is worst than all the traumas I had in the past While you're having a blast I pour henny on a glass Im laying in my backyard im putting tears down in my grass I keep looking for these questions that hide deep inside my mind Im finding parts of me that I thought I'd never find Then I get back on my knees praying to God for just for a sign I say I'll let you go then I pretend like everything is fine I keep lying im trying to let it out I'm seeing how my life is passing and I'm missing out And now my mic is something I could never live without Reciting bout our stories but i don't like saying my thoughts out loud I'm fighting demons and I think I'm loosing Locked in my room producing You hear these melodies but never think for once I'm using The pain I got from March 16th but now it's when bruising But now it's getting worst I'm looking at the path you're choosing I write so much to let it out God I wish I could cry Why do I keep hurting myself just so I see you try They say time is gonna heal it but time is passing by I deserve this this is my tooth for tooth this is my eye for eye This isn't gonna end well I hope this message blends well They always ask for where I am but never how is Denzel Surrounded by these drugs God I think I'm going mental Give me your heart again I promise that I'll be gentle Shooting all the veins in my heart and going on killing spree I find blood around my body I shoot again maybe two times or three I want you dead is what I hear from the deepest of me I'll stay alive I won't let a single feeling get to me But f*ck this shit I'll get over it I know I will I said I'm done but I'm thinking about you still It's like my legs don't hurt it's like the second time I climb the hill I'm trynna find the biggest thoughts so my mind gets fulfilled