What Love Meant

You've complicated love for me The last time I felt good I was with you at the mall I hadn't seen you in six months We watched a shitty horror movie You moved to Malaysia to be with me And we got caught making out And got kicked out of the theatre My parents were at home Thinking I was having lunch with Gabriel Nobody ever held me like you did The sheer weight of the farewells that we bid But that's alright Thank you for the denim jacket I wear it everywhere I go Not because you bought it for me It just fits me like a glove But you know You know my measurements Better than I do And one day You changed the tone in our Skype calls You don't answer my texts and I get high to take my mind off This goes on for six days Then I lose my composure Girl what the hell is wrong She says there's something I should have told you There's this guy And we were both drunk and high He's a few years older than you And I think he's Costa Rican I say forget the goddamn details And just tell me what you're meaning But I knew from the moment I saw her eyes Shame can be so difficult to hide But that's alright You used to tutor your classmates And fail your own tests You made me watch obscure anime And bookmark Pinterests of home decor One day we'll have a house and things will get better Than they are now And I feel like a badass for dating someone older The validation of maturity it made me act so much bolder And it's stuck with me to this very day This is not a song about how you broke my heart And that I'll never be okay It's just that nothing feels like how it did with you I feel ghosts of your presence in this room But that's alright And I don't hate you for what you did I just wish you didn't do it Things would be so simple And I'm not strong enough to go through it all again But thank you for showing me what love meant Thank you for showing me what love meant The time we spent What love meant The time we spent What love meant