PTSD

I'm kinda glad we don't talk much more cuz you were really annoying me All you did was simp over that one girl fucking cloyingly Anytime it was us 3 you'd take her over me no loyalty And in the end you lost both of us messy like a soiled beat I mean that's what you fucking get for being such a massive simp You had no sense of selfrespect head empty like a blimp Some people say pot head as an insult for you it's pot hair People say shit can come from mouths for for you it's hot air I wasn't cool in high school yeah always felt like a loser Got played by this one girl left me feelin like a boomer She did have the prettiest green eyes tho I can still envision them And these cute glasses and when she laughed her voice was like a gem Man writing about all of this got me kinda lovesick Even though I don't wanna date right now focus on the music Cuz this passion is what really gets me out of my bed Finally not dead in the head, gettin ahead, bettin some bread cuz Even though we never ended up dating I sometimes miss you Gave me my first kiss I was hooked like a kid watching ninjitsu Mental health don't discriminate that includes men too Think I might have PTSD from the child abuse This verse goes out to all of those in need who struggle I know it can be tough family shit can get so muddled Especially when your mom's just another Amber Turd What I do is apparently horrible but what she does is subtle Cuz so many times I wanted to hit her back and flip the bird She was always gaslighting me but I wasn't allowed to rebuttal Had to grow up fast and mature with my foot on the gas She gave me a permanent scar as if I'm a fucking body double Always acting like a fucking child shit was so ass She had the brain and physical abilities of a sea bass And people say to reach out but her brother ain't believe me Saying bullshit about how she's 50 and that menopause ain't easy That's why it was so easy for me to catch feelings back then Cuz I've never felt real love not from family or a friend And when my mom has her funeral no I won't attend You weren't ready to have kids go read your fucking tarot cards instead One of my biggest fears is to be a bad parent Wanna create a loving environment so they won't be fraid of sharing I'd love to have 2 kids a girl and a boy And we can all hold the family together like a gold alloy And we can get a cute ass cat I'm thinking Scottish folds Or a Russian blue just something that can spark up some joy Don't want a dog though cuz they're just such restless souls Gotta worry about if they're going ham or eating shit from their bowl Cuz let's not live life as if we've got 9 lives to spare You're only given one chance so let's make the most of it while we're here I'm tired of writing about this so let's wrap it up soon Weaving words from left to right like I'm seated at a loom And I think it'd be nice if we grew old together This ain't up but I can get you balloons in this nice weather Or a perfume with vetiver or a couch made of leather I'll be your hoodie lender and snack vendor with you my anchor