Haunted

Often I lay in my bed and I think about moments that I took for granted Think about friendships and love that I cherished and now leave me all empty handed About how I bottle my feelings 'cause not many people I know understand it About how I'm broken and so isolated from everyone else, yeah I'm stranded But I don't panic, that feeling left me like exes that I don't need coming right back Now I just open my pad and I write these emotions in lyrics to spit on a track It's therapeutic to let out my feelings in music, 'cause bottles get full and they crack And I got bottles and glasses and cups in my cabinet, flooding the shelves and they stack Tell me to talk about life, that's how I'm gonna end up feeling better about it Tell me don't pick up a knife, cutting my heart out my chest 'cause I'm better without it And tell me I can't end my life, that I have a gift and I need to show off all my talent And tell me don't ever think twice, but I'm overthinking and I'm feeling plenty of doubt and I'm feeling so low, wonder why life was so colorful then and now it's turning gray Wonder why memories stick in your head when you desperately, desperately want them to fade Wonder why people can enter your life and can spark all this love and then take it away Wonder why everything I try to do always blows up and fails in my face I'm feeling haunted Feel like my demons got boxed in No matter where I go they're watching I really wanna go but not yet If life forms breath, and breath forms words Then I'm dying slow, my speech is slurred And I'm feeling down, do not disturb Let me, lay alone, where thoughts are heard And I'm in the dark, my heart is cold It's a rainy night, a later road Let me fall apart, and lose my soul Let me fall apart and lose my soul Bury it deep, take all our feelings to pasture and put 'em to sleep Or maybe it's me, but is it strong not to cry or is holding these feelings in weak? Know I don't often discuss what I'm thinking but that's 'cause it feels inconvenient to speak So I save my weakness or strength for the dark of my room where I'm lonely and there I can weep Mountain is steep, I'm on the climb and I'm headed up higher and higher Pray for the wicked and pray for the sinners and pray for the demons and devils and fire Pray for the darkness inside of my mind and be lifted and make myself brighter and brighter Wake up imbalanced, I'm slipping and falling and can't seem to keep both my feet on the wire I'm feeling haunted Feel like my demons got boxed in No matter where I go they're watching I really wanna go but not yet