Can't Dance

My mind’s doing rhythm and my heart’s doing drums But my skinny white legs, they’re all thumbs I got an ear for the music and a foot for the beat But my skinny white hips can’t make no heat I can’t dance, do da whop I can’t dance, do da whop I can’t dance, do da whop I can’t dance My baby she loved me, but she wanted to know Why every time I dance, my legs bow Why my elbows flap and I clear the floor And all the other women take the door I can’t dance, do da whop I can’t dance, do da whop I can’t dance, do da whop I can’t dance She moved like an angel when she did the bop But my knees went wonky Went pop-pop So I swerved to the left and I veered to the right But my beautiful baby took flight I can’t dance, do da whop I can’t dance, do da whop I can’t dance, do da whop I can’t dance I listen to the base and my toes tap time But my skinny white bum is out of line And I can’t get loose like a long-necked goose When my whole rhythm section’s outta juice I can’t dance, do da whop I can’t dance, do da whop I can’t dance, do da whop I can’t dance My mind’s doing rhythm and my heart’s doing drums But my skinny white legs, they’re all thumbs I got an ear for the music and a foot for the beat But my skinny white hips can’t make no heat I can’t dance, do da whop I can’t dance, do da whop I can’t dance, do da whop I can’t dance Hey, hey Brother Are you talking to me? Yeah Can you do the double legged boogaloo? Is that on video? Oh, you got to be kidding Can you do the shake? Last time I did the shake was in California Shake Oh, everybody can do that But can you do the Jerk Not voluntarily baby, not voluntarily ‘Cause if you want to dance you got to feel the groove And get into a trance Hey look, I read about it, Nietzsche said dancing was a metaphor Then you got to shake your human self around That’s it, brother Damn Mama, I can’t dance