Note 2: The Ghost

Everyone I've come to know are like leaves on a tree There one minute n' then gone with the breeze Missin' shadows has me dyin' from within My sins surely grin as they tear me limb from limb How do you save a man from a fire he stared? Screaming mercy, keepin' that flame heavily guarded? I'm only burnin' 'cause I brought this on myself So don't waste your time, turn on a dime, n' save your help for someone else Believe it or not, I once had wealth Knew riches of love that can't be manufactured on a conveyor belt Nah, you won't find em' on a store shelf or bubble wrapped Nothin' compares to runnin' with that loyal pack Makin' a pact to attack anyone who dare retaliate back Shit, in the end, nothin' beats havin' those true friends N' now they got me sittin' in the dark, talking to the walls again, like Falling, Fading Down, down, down I go I'm crashin' bow-first, my instinct's to abandon hope Goin' 80 naughts, count em' 13 knots in my escape rope String em' up with the sails, cast em' as high as they go Wavin' farewell to those below as the wind blows This isn't a trope, no Hard to be high when I'm so low And I am but a mere stone's throw away form becoming the addict I tried to outgrow N' it's hard to remain calm, try not to light up like napalm Grittin' my teeth n' acceptin' the fact that I don't fuckin' belong here I might as well be a ghost here All my words fallin' on deaf ears Contact prohibited, forcin' my body up outta the atmosphere Relax, I need to come down before I relapse I need to find ground before I collapse I'm lookin' for someone to have my back Where the f*ck are they at? All ya'll see is a fiend, the addict, no man in between Thinkin' the track marks under my sleeve is reason to leave me to bleed I can't admit defeat, but I'm on broken knees Please someone say they won't leave n' just believe in me, 'cause I'm Falling, Fading Down, down, down I go Man, it's a long dark road I'm walkin' on my own Told to atone for my sins and hope that I don't wake the ghost The one who sheltered me from the bitter cold Said the driven snow is my ticket outta this hell hole Perhaps heaven only knows how to correct my soul But that door closed when I embraced the shadows Starin' head on into the bottom of a barrel How long's it take an angel to notice I'm in fuckin' peril Singin' a lost carol, hopin' someone is listenin' Feelin' my words, catchin' the point, not missin' it Everything's a fuckin' mess, this isn't the way I pictured it When reachin' out for mercy, feelin' like they don't give a shit The only thing that's every made me whole is my emptiness I've spent so much time wrapped up in this scrimmages No one will ever know the shit I see, the vividness N' you can have my life, because death is a privilege Falling, fading Down, down, down I go