Tub Shitter / Shrimp Eater / Stall Tipper / 22 Rifles (Anti-War Song)

I arrive at the apartment, smiling naively A dear friend turns 400 years To celebrate me and my friends have all gathered And one snuck in gin and some beer I didn't expect to have alcohol near But I can't say no to a good time And I'm ashamed to admit that 1 glass turned to 4 And when the bottle is empty I'm left wanting more And reality fades and it turns to a haze And my last meal escapes through the hole in my face And the residue stains both my shirt and my face I remember the feeling of porcelain On my naked skin Before he switched sides our friend John used to serve with Two fishers of opposite skin He watched as their friendship began to evolve A long monologue about shrimp Shrimp stew and burgers, gumbo, kebabs It's the fruit of the sea Impressed by what he just overheard John was inspired to try This magical food that ol Benjamin spoke of As a child John was not much for seafood But he's lived an exciting life, he likes variety Fry them or broil them or boil them or bake them When Bubba-Gump finally opened in London He cried tears of joy cause he could foinally troi This magical monster that Buford called fruit Big John quickly became a regular guest But nothing lived up to the opening day That was 6 years before Big Johnny Went out with a bang Measuring muscle in distance, not weight At home he preserves citrus fruits Sometimes he goes to the rhythmical school Acting as a substitute One Tuesday morning assigned to our namesake Our hero picks up the bass And we play a song, a work in progress in waltz time The dissonant outro pierced through my ears But he didn't mind it, he looked at me and smiled said I think what you have is a stall tipper, man And ever since then every string that I bend Is in honour of that pear-shaped man By the door By the door I don't usually do this But I wanna explain a couple things about the lyrics to this song See this is what is called "meta", it's self-referential But that's not relevant, what is relevant is the thing I wanna explain Earlier in the song I used the term "Our namesake" This means that You see This The man we are singing about The pear-shaped man who preserves citrus fruits at home He, uh, was assigned as a substitute to our "namesake" E8, entry level 8 You see we are named after a classroom in our school As well as, uhm, "profile ensemble" Which I don't know It was something other than "production ensemble", I guess I don't really know Listen to this now, you're gonna love this This is the end of Stall Tipper Now get ready For something else Something else Once they were boys, now they are men But now they are gone 22 Rifles on the battlefield People around, tremble in fear as they pass All that they see Destruction and devastation where they used to live Leaving ar Leaving behind a trail of destruction Volcanic eruption Once they were men, now they are dead They're gone But all that remains 22 Rifles on the battlefield But all that I see Ashes where my young boy used to be Nuclear bomb Nuclear wasteland All I see 22 Rifles on the battlefield Now, now, now Now now, now All I see Rifles on the battlefield 22 Rifles on the battlefield