If Only

Lonely You know that I lost myself a while ago I do and don't want you to hold me So confused that maybe I should learn to let it go Cuz it's leaving me Lonely You know that I lost myself a while ago Admit to myself I'm controlling So confused that maybe I should learn to let it go If only If only you knew why I laughed To cover up the pain and mask All the aching all the torture in my mind from past failed Loves to me I think I knew would never last Look I would never admit it though Dropping all my pride was too difficult Know you feel the same But I can't take another second Livin broken reminiscing Back on all of the same things So I work on music til I can't breathe Finish up a song Question my integrity Sittin by myself and analyzing who I wanna be Then I re write it over and over In the end because I know that I am Lonely You know that I lost myself a while ago I do and don't want you to hold me So confused that maybe I should learn to let it go Cuz it's leaving me Lonely You know that I lost myself a while ago Admit to myself I'm controlling So confused that maybe I should learn to let it go If only I'm fine I'm fine is what I tell myself but I'm livin' a lie Everybodies lonely sometimes Alright I'm fine I'm fine is what I tell myself but I'm livin' a lie Everybodies lonely sometimes Alright I'm fine I'm fine is what I tell myself but I'm livin' a lie Everybodies lonely sometimes Alright I'm fine I'm fine is what I tell myself but I'm livin' a lie Everybodies lonely sometimes Alright Lately I've been acting kinda different Suicidal thoughts Wishing that I wasn't lost Maybe I should learn to change it Rearranging I'm not faking Crying out for help like Dear God You know that I gotta get this off my chest Lately been alone and I'm way too depressed Someone has to get this Quiet in my home More deafening than standing at a show in the front row Life And vision go sideways Slow-Mo A sign I should be leaving But I never bring myself to walk away and go Really think I'm lonely Maybe I should pick up my phone Lonely You know that I lost myself a while ago I do and don't want you to hold me So confused that maybe I should learn to let it go Cuz it's leaving me Lonely You know that I lost myself a while ago Admit to myself I'm controlling So confused that maybe I should learn to let it go