Dear Diary

It's Like Sometimes you don't know what to say or how to say it The pain don't stop The clouds don't go away and the rain keeps coming And I always just find myself with my pen and some pages Welcome to my diary Let's get it Put my pencil to the pad this my diary I open up to you and give you everything inside of me Letting out this pain and pen keep on guiding me My girl wanna talk but I can't vent but I'm trying Bre Lost myself when I lost John man it frightened me I see him pop up in my dreams it keep reminding me And I ain't even get to grieve I did it silently I never speak up on it I just keep it in my diary I know its not right but thats all I got left Only way I know to get this shit up off my chest I be tryna live right tryna do my best But I know if I walk the streets without my pipe then I'll get stretched And I ain't talking to no therapist save it for my diary Grew up in the trenches next door it was poverty Ask my momma if I'll die young she said probably Tell my shooter look me in the eye and kill me properly Not praying for my life and I ain't begging it for it either Bleeding on these pages while Im fighting off these demons Gripping on my pen while Im clutching on the heater Dear Diary I'm telling you cause I know you'll keep my secrets Miss my niggas miss my cousin miss my uncle Never said goodbye but I know y'all know that I loved you Break bread with whose left hoping that shit double No second chances if you cross me then it's f*ck you I turned my L's into lessons Like never show you hand dog you gotta keep em guessing And when you hit the stu you cant be posting during sessions Cause then they got the drop on you so always have your weapon If niggas acting different and asking lot of questions He probably got a wire on the feds probably listening Before you go to bed dog just always count your blessings Tomorrow's not promised you can die here any second And dear diary Im going through some changes I can see the difference while I'm flipping through the pages Looking to the lord but I know he wont save us Gotta get a safe because this money getting dangerous Always keep it real and I ain't never been a actor Back against the wall I'm solid it don't matter Not worried bout now I'm just thinking bout after Welcome to my diary on to the next chapter