The Pessimist

Crawl out and bleed in the sun Goose bumps go raised to design The rock that was crushing your home You just want to rest your head and cry I don't know what it takes I don't know the in between I don't know what's inside I don't know what it means I know what I haven't found I know my knuckles bleed I know I choke a lot Because of what I know I just sit dumb in wonder Waiting for it to blow over Where is the palette to paint Praying to create a new me Never answer to correct Make the effort to connect If I drop, I'll ignore Kick it to the curb to rot Feelings talk me into mute Give me a shot and I'll shoot Only to regret the noise Of broken boundaries busted toys I don't floss I don't recycle I don't drink water I steal bicycles I don't talk to my family Never say excuse me So excuse me for being rude Because I'm in pain From all this shame From all this shame I just sit dumb in wonder Waiting for it to blow over Where is the palette to paint Praying to create a new me Things don't feel right Go strong, in wrong Don't budge, tare it down Big pain all shame Will I ever be free From all this knowing What I see Forty eight years and counting I'm in pain from all this shame Will I ever be free From all this knowing Will I ever be free From all this knowing So much pain from all this shame So much pain from all this shame