Still Breathing...

Finally going home Exhausted you could tell just by the tone Still breathing but the breathing kinda slow Been through a lot valleys but this valley kinda low I ain't blaming tho I'm just thanking God that it's over Seen too many miracles to get a chip up on my shoulder But now that I'm older I thank him for the rain But little did I know that up ahead were hurricanes Walk into my room everything just how I left it Bible on my table been a week since I read it Might as well read it now if not then I'll regret it But I just went through hell and my bed lookin like heaven I know that God will get it man it's been a long day IVs surgeries man I've come a long way So I go and hit the hay but not before I pray Thank you Lord I promise that tomorrow I'll obey Night one not gunna lie was pretty hard I didn't sleep much but it's not like that's bizarre Heading to the couch cause I know that's as far as I'm gunna go two weeks till I can drive a car Cant be that long so I ain't gon make a fuss But being isolated is the devil's favorite lunch It only took a week before I fell back into lust I wonder why I was so weak my Bible still collecting dust So I go to pick it up cause I don't wanna fall again I wanna live a holy life I'm not a slave to sin God has won the victory this don't feel like a win I hear him saying that he missing me but I ain't listening I'd rather try to fix my misery than give my sin to him Now my history repeats and instantly I move an inch Away from all my friends result to social distancing But how real is a friend if they don't know the truth within 8 weeks have passed now almost at the ninth Back to reading my Bible just had to give it time Back to chasing purity and back to writing rhymes Finally Getting back to normal but I'm still not at my prime Feel a little pain again but I'm gon be alright Next week I got the biggest show of my life I gotta be alright I have to be alright If not I'll start a fight The last pop the Left dropped Now they talking bout the right Hol up nah this can't be happening I'm finally getting better I finally found consistency and got my life together Submerged I can't tell what's rain or tears on my sweater Now your telling me that up aheads another storm to weather Got these IVs tubes sticking out of my chest Spiritual life is wreck And for the pain percocets They help the cuts but these wounds travel deeper than flesh They keep me up so I can never meet the cousin of death Lord why is it me Tell me why is it me I thought you wanted me to rap and preach to set people free Now I need a whole tube just to sit up and breathe With my biggest show happening at the end of the week Man it was supposed to be me Man it was supposed to be me I was supposed to be artist that would show them the king With some brothers that rock they've had some food from the top They was gon elevate my name to preach your name to the flock Man it's about time I learned this lesson Take a step back and truly take a second Check my heart and if the veins that's connected Stem from my God or the pride on the guest list No matter how wrong it might be I invite him in He makes me feel good doesn't every sin? But he's the reason that my brothers looked like stepping stones if I did that show there's no telling how my pride would spin So now I see all of this pain as a blessing Thanking God he ain't let me stray from heaven All this down time made me raise the question Am I doing this for God or to make a good impression I hope you all can learn from this story that I'm bleeding You can never be content with attention or achievement It's all very fleeting that's the message he was speaking and His breath brings healing so maybe that's the reason that I'm Still breathing Yeah maybe that's the reason that I'm still breathing Yeah uh still breathing still breathing Still breathing still breathing Still breathing Yeah maybe that's the reason that I'm Still breathing still breathing still breathing huh here I am I tell em I'm still breathing homie here I am I said here I am I said here I am I said I told em I'm still breathing man here I am I only fear I am I told em here I am lets go