Call it Quits

I'm just gonna keep heading up this mountain until I don't doubt myself anymore And if I don't get it right maybe I'll call it quits Alright I think I'ma call it quits Sit on my accomplishments I'm convinced that I am sick But also know that I'm a prince On the fence, on I'm calling since I Balled up since I lost my shit All because the law was thick In my business, all so twisted Even if I rolled up in a Rolls, With all my soldiers in it Don't think I could sprawl a visit Even if the law was with it If I told all existence The whole list of all I did Through all the ditches I have been in They would crawl up a tall wall to miss it Can't convince them, I'm a fallen victim Plus, I'm sure they wouldn't listen Even though I'm a Christian I'd still be completely dissed Be so pissed and leave it to the distance Breathing steam and spitting venom Bleeding wisdom, leaving this old skin Completely shredded Headed for an evening I'm completely dreading Reading through this evenings section of grief And I can see it's a beast Of dark and deep depression In a demon setting A freak, so freely ready to leave This heavy grief And deeply rest into a peaceful setting Pleasing sleep, just let me be As I ease into my dreams Ascend me please I beg and plead I'm on my knees So I pray when I lay down my head Feel the ground shake Like an earthquake As it vibrates through my head Face all red now, Heart's racing I'm a mess now, What am I about to face Hope I won't be let down Hear a voice clear as day Like thunder Saying get down So I get down I can no longer improvise This is why my hidden pride Is no longer giving vibes As I sit and cry, this won't fly Just wanna slip and slide In my ride Till I collide I should've died To my demise I'm living why These thoughts, They sit and fry inside my mind When will I find some forgiveness cause I've given mine I should've tried harder Instead of letting my partner leave my side Could've went farther, But I lied Now I'm starving for my life Someone carve me with a knife Cause I'm hardly doing right Cut an artery, give a slice Cause my heart can't even partially Start another night of this arguing For what are we If we're bartering with our lives Took my card charged it twice Far from being nice In archery woulda hit this target With a dart that's lit Sparks would ignite Till it blows apart a bit When hitting me In the center of the heart of my life Far from being anything Other than articles of pain As I'm marching towards the light Carting my cart of hard to reach parts of me that I write And this is hardly but a slice Just a part of war Within my mind Wish I could rewind Wish I could change the past But I can't take it back Would rather step on a rake And have it stake my naked ass Then leave the situation as it is As we break in half Not knowing what we're gonna make it as Lately I'm ashamed and sad Forget the fame I'll take it back Eat snakes and rats Lay on my back in a Jason mask While people whoop my ass Till this day's my last I guess nothing I can say Will change the facts The picture perfect frame until I break the glass I guess the days have passed I pray the latter days are fast The mates we pick are glass So we can see through the mistakes and laugh If I could say my prayers in rhyme form During the storm you designed for him Would I be boring or at the morgue When the time's gone Cause if that's the course I'm on I'm gonna need a jury When I'm torn from this journey that I'm on If not then assure me My time's long That I'm strong enough Don't discourage me when I'm wrong Even if I'm old and drunk Just hold me up Encourage me not to fold it up Cause all the stuff I've been through's tough enough To roll with instead of calling cut Like the director I'm rolling all takes Been bold enough Even when my knees weak And it's the last stake My shoulders shrug Barely hold them up And crawl on up To a level that's ultra rough Making this all worth it So am I wrong or what Cause if I am Then you are all nuts And this soldier stuff All just sucks