Dreams of Fire

I wake up in a pool of blood Every night I pretend to die Pretending that my plight was right My sinking head on your knees No reply My heart was bleeding throes Conjuring the pose of mother Mary Me On a cliff out by the sea The ring bearer is our dead friend I see him every time I get the fucking bends He's smiling he looks happy to me You hold my neck like I'm a newborn Useless bag of bones Till you teach me what I lack Until you teach me how to love you back It's hard Holding the gaze of your eyes If I'm not the only one you call It's hard Keeping my posture at all If I keep crawling back when I'm called There's fire There's love There's nothing