When I Pretend

Part of me breaks every time I see faces that I don't want on my mind Time speeds up pace and the seasons go racing I'm tired of saying goodbye I don't want to talk or answer your questions I'm sick of this process of learning my lessons alone and prone It's all that I know, I'm waiting for answers or some kind control When I pretend everything goes away When I stand still living day by day, day Denying and hiding and dividing pride is the way you lose your life I can say I tried but I couldn't quite decide priorities that I hold high No one in the world, no one in the place I'm singing this song to the wall, to my face It's not me, not you, but all solitude I need space If I pretend everything goes away When I close my eyes, nobody sees me cry Open eyes from a dream I don't see you, it's only me I don't know why I could lie I need dreams that make me high Put pressure on a beating heart to feel the pain commitment starts I wish I could've dealt with things so casually and fearlessly It's hard to know you'll think of me as someone who could never be a winner but a fire starter I'm ready to go back to sleep