Stitches

Sometimes I wonder if this shit is even worth it Tryna hide these feelings of pride under the surface Got me thinking crazy shit like what my fuckin worth is Never really sure of it, na, never really certain Sometimes I wonder what's the purpose of this circus Shit only made me nervous or took what's in my purses Got me writing and savin all of my fuckin verses Tryna be a better person before the condition worsens Sometimes I try to put my thoughts into my verses Tryna hide these feelings of uncontrollable urges Maybe losing him is the reason they rarely surface Tryna find the signs on celings of notable churches Sometimes I try to turn my losses into purpose Tryna hide the bleeding from these emotional grudges Maybe that's the reason my traumas always resurface Kinda like the feeling of healing them broken Dutches Sometimes I try to keep these hoes out of my business Never saying no if they're present, though, like it's Christmas All these bitches wanna know is if you got the sickness They don't wanna know bout the shit you had to witness Sometimes I wonder if they're gifts or if they're curses And how much do I got fore I fall under the burden Maybe losing her is the reason I make the purchase And they all roll just the same, but different versions Sometimes I wonder if they'll ever hear these verses If they'll ever grow the balls to look behind the curtains Cursing me for serving the culture, the culture lurking I lift a finger, a blink and the hearses working Got me fighting daily like I wake up feeling nervous Then I look in the mirror and see what your concern is All my stiches wanna do is burst open the hurt and Show you how I made it but it's you who put work in Get it? All my stiches wanna do is burst open the hurt and Show you how I made it but it's you who put the work in, bitch If you saw where we came from, you'd be surprised as hell We made it out from the snake farm, still alive to tell Where the ones who gain from you, are the ones who fight you No good neighbors like State Farm, but we survived to Inspire those who they couldn't, we call it hope dealing Deny those who they wouldn't, we call it door sealing Design roads that were missing, ways to promote healin' F*ck, we spoke when they wouldn't, gave em that woke feeling Supply hope to dope dealers, made em think of better Think of beggars to leaders, yeah, never think of lesser Apply a choke to their beaters, made em think of pressure Think of rats in a trap, yeah, made em think of cheddar When I said I don't get her, that shit I think upset her She think of me like a joker, just like I'm fucking ledger But actin like we together, she needed a refresher It's not the pleasure, my precious, honesty is the measure And you can measure my treasure, I got a heart of gold She put it under the weather, so it turned kind of cold The pain is just like a sweater, though, I just smile and roll 99 probs but a bitch ain't one, like Carter told