(It's) Hairspray

And now, live from the certified, up-to-code WZZT Studios In beautiful downtown Baltimore, for the first time ever on nationwide television It's the Corny Collins Primetime Spectacular He's Corny! Brought to you by Ultra-Clutch Hairspray! What gives a girl power and punch? Is it charm, is it poise? No, it's hairspray What gets a gal asked out to lunch Is it brains, is it dough? No, it's hairspray If you take a ride With no can at your side Then your flip will be gone with the wind But if you spray it and lock it You can take off in a rocket And in outer space Each hair will be in place Why take a chance If you get up and dance? If you twist, I insist You use hairspray And tell your mother Her head she should smother With Ultra Clutch faithfully So if you're a redhead, a blonde or brunette Just take my advice and you might just get (you might just get) The only thing better than hairspray, that's me Ska-doo-dle-e-ya, doo-dle-e-ya do wah Forget the milkman, the only thing better than hairspray Hairspray, wow! That's me Ahh! What makes a man reach out and touch? Ultra Clutch! So if you're a redhead, a blonde or brunette (ooh) Just take my advice and you might just get (you might just get) The only thing better than hairspray, that's me Ska-doo-dle-e-ya, doo-dle-e-ya do wah, he's Corny Collins The only thing better than hairspray Hairspray, wow! That's me Ska-doo-dle-e-ya do wah Ska-doo-dle-e-ya do wah, do wah Hey, baby, you look like you could use a stiff one! Ska-doo-dle-e-ya do wah!