past sense

Lying face down on my bed Don't think I can get up yet Palm to my aching head Don't want to start anything Can I move slow sometimes? Thinking back on what I said Imaginary scenes where I do the wrong things over and over again I'm living with regret I can't slow down sometimes I often try my best I need reminders to take deep breaths I never forget to stretch My mind is a mess Can we slow down this time? I'm trying to be better now But that moment passes when substances enter my bloodstream by mouth I keep laying land mines outside my bed, so I can't take a step without blowing up the whole fucking place again And again, and again, and again I'm presently tense I'm past sense I'm presently tense I'm past sense I'm staying in bed