Terrified

I bet by now you're sick of hearing about my past Every day a new sad story, worse than the last I've been broken, battered, beaten, black and blue And I'm terrified that it could happen with you Restless pacing round but smiling while I'm sad By a long-shot you're the best I've ever had You came with comfort, cleaned and covered all the cuts But I'm terrified of the ands, the ifs, the buts All my joy holds hands with underlying fear That it'll crumble just as fast as it appeared Giving vulnerability yet another try Afraid that yours could just turn out to be a lie Anxious attachment that I'm working to combat But it's a war zone, down in merely seconds flat I'm fighting, flailing, fumbling, fell flat on my face And I'm terrified that I can't grow from this place All my joy holds hands with underlying fear That it'll crumble just as fast as it appeared Giving vulnerability yet another try Afraid that yours could just turn out to be a lie The puzzle pieces in their place Ooh what happens when I cannot erase The tests, the more or lessons that ran my spirit dry Nothing's wrong, but I'm afraid it's finally right I'm scared of everything, all my fears they just accrue But I'm terrified that I'm not scared of you