Detached

It was less than a perfect match The photo to the negative Since I've confessed I've been turning back The clocks searching through my memories knowing I could never give The beneficial doubt to myself Worried I've been hiding what I am about from myself What's it mean to go to heaven just to have a cloud to yourself And they say the proud go to hell, while I'm meaning well There could be compelling evidence No telling how wrong I might have been ever since I've been selling out thinking my opinions are indicative While your criticism still exists, through the thickest mist I've been picking ignorance my vision isn't twenty-twenty So there's plenty reason to believe I haven't spent enough energy seizing all the means Of producing empathy, I'm confused to say the least Please excuse me I'm not used to being seen by other human beings Tell me what you see I need a new tether to reality Because whether I've been Alicing in Wonderland I need to understand the fallacies that martyrdom demands Once you start to come to terms with departure from the land of the free You can earn a reputation that's consistent with the mirror Even if they're just imagination I'm insisting That we listen clearer till the whispers disappear If I've lived a dozen lives then in the first eleven I was unapprised of the hundred miles separating earth and heaven Of all the days between my birth and death enough unwisely Spent on idolizing biased versions of events First impressions can be permanent certain etiquette determines many worries That I'm burdened with, you're the judge, jury, and Executioner, searching the minutiae for A clue referring you to the conclusion lurking in my head What's more real, the version that I perceive Or the person you've been documenting on arrival leaving all the chance behind to Honor my aversion to deceit, it's been tantalizing to imagine, ponder, and believe That I'm actually the me that I ought to be, tell myself I gotta be Operating in my own autonomy is obsolete, nominating me to be deleted So I'm offering an opportunity to intervene it's pretty simple All I need to do is be a little nimbler Following the truth, no more living in the singular So many things to learn, see the tinder burning If I want to fight a fire better search for little warnings