Pain

I need the answer, to all the pain Before all the shame, comes back again Meeting my maker, waited in vain Before all the pain, comes back again Now I'm dealing with my heart I couldn't feel the same Not feeling so conceited I'm the one to take the blame I don't want to, but I stress My anxiety's a mess I want to end it all But it's a permanent attempt I know my life is meant to be better than this Cause if it isn't Then why'd it start here to begin with I feel it, it's switching my life's point of view Things will get better, i'll make it the truth Sometimes its harder cause we're falling back Falling deeper in my head And then the demons attack And Now the pressure is on I dont got time to relax But if we had another moment I don't want it to pass But everything that's good Will always come to end I see it all the time It's gon' be there to defend So imma pray to God That gon' let me ascend Cause darkness is not someone I would call a friend I need the answer, to all the pain Before all the shame, comes back again Meeting my maker, waited in vain Before all the pain, comes back again Feel like I'm drowning In a world that likes to fake it God if you had a different plan for me Then I won't debate it But can you at least Show me all the things I'm near? Cause I'm lost, and from here Your voice is kinda hard to hear Can you just shout it out Or even point me to The place I need to go As long as it's for you Cause life has been kicking me, While I'm on the ground And this pain it hurts so much That it's hard to make a sound I want to scream so loud But my voice is staying silent I've been trying to play nice But this world is always violent I keep trying to gain some ground Cause I'm always trying to fight it But How much more can I take When there's nothing left to fight with Despite this How much longer can I last The way emotions got me feeling Makes it different from my past The quicker I feel weak The faster they attack In society it's even dangerous Just to get attached I need the answer, to all the pain Before all the shame, comes back again Meeting my maker, waited in vain Before all the pain, comes back again Im stuck in a storm I feel it in waves Im trying my best To wish it away I made a habit Im stuck in a phase I fight to get out Gonna make it okay I'm sick and I'm tired of pain Missing the days of feeling okay Having the issue inside of my brain But am I deserving of all of the pain Feeling my life is posioned But im gonna call it a novacane Wish i was paralyzed So I wouldnt be feeling a thing All overwhelming the feeling of selling My soul to the demon I feel like im nothing I know that im something A making of coming When I didnt really have nothing I wanted a change I just gotta let it out Im gonna get me through it Blocking out the ones who say I wont I bet ill prove it This is gonna be the dream for life I gotta do it So if im wrong then you got it Hope youre happy viewing All my heart and all my tears Getting broke and ruined Its all I wanted, all I loved The only passion I was pursuing The only dream ive ever had So I hope youre really happy If my life gets split in half I need the answer, to all the pain Before all the shame, comes back again Meeting my maker, waited in vain Before all the pain, comes back again