The Old Me

Reading letters from the old me Really hated how I felt I was bullied Outcasted, picked on Just another freak Nobody even tried to get to know me Trying suicide, when I was lonely Getting cold feet Cowardice controlling me Suffocating, no room to breathe Overwhelmed, and I can't be free I'm still weak I don't see it as a strength no more I don't think that I am worthy Why'd I get this for? Feeling like they only did it Cause they got that bored Or maybe its a consequence Of when they didn't do their chores Sorry its product of your life at home But I was just begging to be left alone It's all staying with me, everyday ive grown They're the reason that im still here watching my tone So, maybe it is better that I took on the pain And dealt with all the bullies who were giving me hate Or maybe id be different, I wouldn't be me I'm happy with me, I think This is just the path that I was meant to be on Be strong, for any moment that you need to Lean on, these arms Try to understand that you can beat them And leave them, you're free to lead them And never be them You'll never be them Reading letters from the old me Really hated how I felt I was bullied Outcasted, picked on Just another freak Nobody even tried to get to know me Trying suicide, when I was lonely Getting cold feet Cowardice controlling me Suffocating, no room to breathe Overwhelmed, and I can't be free I'm still weak I don't think that I am okay Been a lot of years but there's a lot that I am holding Still up in my head, it's really hard to just forget it Self esteem is steaming Try to catch it but it's so late It's not over til I say it's over I'm still fighting, fighting for my own cure Kinda wanna drink, cause I hate being sober But im scared addiction will be holding my controller I don't think that im safe I don't think that it's smart I don't wanna deliver The devil my heart On a platter, ill scatter and keep moving on Save up the rest of my life til it's gone I'm on my lawn, but the grass isn't greener It never did grow, cause I was born a deceiver I'm receiving they love, but they never did know me I will never open up til my casket is closing Damn And it's all thanks to the old me The old me