Luigi's Aspirations

Someday I’m gonna reach out my hand And have the courage to touch the butt Of the nearest woman or man Someday I’m gonna peep through a hole And be able to watch somebody Who’s revealing it all Someday I’m gonna step out from my brother’s shadow Become my own man I’ll go out in public In my wife-beater shirt And when I see someone bend over I’ll fondle my nipples ‘til they hurt I’m gonna be a pervert That’s what I’m gonna do Your ass is a magnet To which my eyes are glued And when you hang out your laundry I’ll come steal your underwear And when you’re home sleeping I’ll sneak in and smell your hair I’m gonna be pervert Just you wait and see I crave human contact But no one wants to touch me That's the dream my friend That's what I'm gonna do And if I need some comfort I'll jerk off in this shoe Y'know At least I don't eat like forty pizzas before I go to bed