Heartbreak

Time to pretend I don't want this Time to pretend like I'm better than before Time to find a way to look away and move on I won't waste my time I won't hold my breath Looking for smoke I can catch with my bare hands Or maybe I'm the smoke that looks for home within your grasp? Why don't you look in my eyes now? Tell me where you'll be when we've both calmed down? Because if it's just a game Then I'll play along Even if it hurts Even if we're wrong I'll stop the river running from my eyes Don't worry, there will be another guy And then I'll find a way to f*ck it up like I do every time When nothing goes right, it's only natural to think there's something wrong When the pattern threaded through my head has grown so long I want to look in your eyes now Tell you that I'll love you when I learn how But now it's just a game So I'll play along And I'll lose again if I can't move on I watch my body drift apart in another pair of arms And soon I lose track of which heartbreak I was thinking of My fragile fingers fell apart against your flesh I knew they would collapse with your caress And now I feel like I've run out of opportunities to miss I won't waste my time I won't hold my breath Making a cage with my fingers to contain what can't be kept Or maybe I'm the smoke, a shapeless ghost, that slips right past? I try to take your shape, but it never lasts We never get taught to talk to each other like this This is not the love they said we'd find This is the love they say isn't right This is the love we that fought with our lives to define That I'm now failing to recognize So easy to begin, so hard to keep I always think you're the one But you never make up for all my missing sleep I watch my body drift apart in another pair of arms And soon I lose track of which heartbreak I was thinking of My fragile fingers fell apart against your flesh I knew they would collapse with your caress And now I feel like I've run out of opportunities to miss Because I wasted time Because I held my breath I won't let my failures hold me back I'll go out and fail again and again And again