Hungover

I'm just a head case abandoned at random, stranded in dead space That disassociates like a phantom shadow and spectates Looks like I've ran outta Ativan to ingest, great I guess I'll stick with my master plan to accept fate My world collapses when I focus on mistakes I've made As every opportunity that's thrown at me just sails away And every dollar that I failed to save is like a wasted day This sunshine in a bag will make it A-OK I'm not opposed to a temporary fix You gotta do what you gotta do like a cemetery shift, yo Why am I falling down this endless scary pit? You gotta leap before you plummet, that's a necessary risk, but When I wake up my tongue is like sand paper Got this poison on my breath like I'm stuck in a gas chamber And it's always the result of a couple of grams later Tried to eat but I struggled to stomach the bland flavor I wanna crawl into a hole and die, lock then door then close the blinds And sleep forever, dreaming of exotic shores and open skies Sinkin' and descendin' to the ocean floor with open eyes Driftin' while suspended in this glowin' orb I float inside And maybe if I wake up I can finally learn to socialize Without a can of courage so I fight the urge and go get high Half my life is like these hangovers I so despise There is no order since the chaos is my only guide My temples throb 'til I can't bear it, every second stops Either I'm trippin' or I'm wearing a defective watch But it can't compare to all these terrible and wretched thoughts That set me off, pullin' at my hair 'til I reset my clocks My type of therapy is hit and miss like Vegas slots The doctor said that my electric shocks are sent in megawatts And still I spiral into madness, can't connect the dots I vaguely recollect what happened after twenty shots When I was young I had phenomenal gifts I'd swan dive head first into these bottomless pits With no fear, now I question every path that I take I make mistakes some of which are on the back of a plate Now, I'm in an ocean treading water while I die of thirst And feelin' like I'm locked within coffin that's inside a hearse I've tried to quit, this time it's different and I'm gonna say I swear I'm never drinking again, for a couple days I wanna crawl into a hole and die, lock then door then close the blinds And sleep forever, dreaming of exotic shores and open skies Sinkin' and descendin' to the ocean floor with open eyes Driftin' while suspended in this glowin' orb I float inside And maybe if I wake up I can finally learn to socialize Without a can of courage so I fight the urge and go get high Half my life is like these hangovers I so despise There is no order since the chaos is my only guide All he says is kill me, kill me, kill me He says kill me, over and over again I wanna crawl into a hole and die, lock then door then close the blinds And sleep forever, dreaming of exotic shores and open skies Sinkin' and descendin' to the ocean floor with open eyes Driftin' while suspended in this glowin' orb I float inside And maybe if I wake up I can finally learn to socialize Without a can of courage so I fight the urge and go get high Half my life is like these hangovers I so despise There is no order since the chaos is my only guide