Goodbye.. II

The tears that fall are the raindrops drowning Look at the written note, just start laughing Feel like a maniac, but I calm down And immediately wonder about my own passing How would the ones that I care for react? If I passed would I matter or be part of the past? Heart shattered, and I've tried but can't pick up the glass The one thing I do know is I'm fading fast I can't fuckin do this, I'm done going through it I feel like a nuisance, I'm sick of the bruises, That life is inflicting, I don't wanna feel the pain anymore I just want to fix it I just wanted to be well I told myself that I would walk through hell And I would freeze every single last inch of the place Before I came out of my shell But this the end isn't it? You tried just wishing that you'd go to heaven But you've never been innocent You didn't give enough to the ones that you cherished And now you can live with regret as you perish Die alone, no loved ones around you Never be a single tear shed about you Permanently sleep let the dark surround you And dwell among the demons your soul is bound to I'm sorry that I couldn't hold on I tried my best, but in the end I'm not strong I'm so weak, yeah it didn't take long For me to have write another song About suicide to decide, whether or not I would finally work up the courage to stop Giving a f*ck about what I thought And just go through with all of it let myself rot My problems will all go away if I leave No more sadness and no struggle to breathe Finally feel like I can be free And everyone would just move on without me No hospital, I don't wanna hear the flatline Echoing as I breathe for the last time Looking back I don't wanna see the bad times I just want to make it so no one has my bad mind I can feel the life drain from with in me Rope tight round my neck and I can't breathe See the light so my arm I'm extending Never thought my story would have this ending "You'll get over it" no way "Isaac we're all here for you" god you're so fake "You know God loves you" I know I get no grace My soul stays in the same place where my hope fades I wont stay, and just wait for someone to make my decisions I'm done participating, you only talk and never listen Tried to make me into you and I became resistant I don't wanna see you again so keep your distance Never cared about me, you just worry bout yourself And now that I'm free you can target someone else What I thought we could be turned to energy expelled So I'm done fighting, and I'll just see you in hell I'm sure I won't ever be mentioned And if I do it'll be the bitter resentment That people held toward me for just being reckless And letting all their words into my head for nesting Laid down to die, Body paralyzed, he won't ever rise But it's no surprise, just close your eyes, and close your heart You won't see light, walk toward the dark And to those that will cry when this song drops Just know that my heartbeat hasn't stopped This is what I have to do to keep myself here To make sure I have control of my head I won't fall off The day hasn't come yet where you'd have to cry Place your warm hands one the cold ones of mine At the casket to see no life in my eyes And talk to me one last time to say goodbye