Shotgun Wedding

Pittsburgh and the carriage strung Befuddled in Philadelphian gloves A shotgun wedding of the shaking young Bloodletting, look at all the fun we're having! In waterparks and restrooms Hatchets for our honeymoon Like the taxman Here too soon Dust on the bouquet Blood on the groom The golden geese clog aqueducts And the pastor drowned the doves No omens come for those with luck Please don't say you love me when we're plastered and starstruck We'll continue wasting away That's obviously what you wanted If our desire was to be saved We'd need more than stages and watchbands