idk why its like this

Moved to town about twenty nineteen Prime years of being a troubled teen New school new friends repeat But I think this place is pretty sweet Great group of friends and the love of my life Didn't see it coming let the world roll the dice Threw a party kissed her on the first day Asked her out on Lil Peep's birthday Played in a band we were metal heads Writing music in the basement torn to shreds Sneaking out getting stoned as f*ck Getting into trouble yeah we were on the run Starry nights, pretty sights, and no fights Nothing but good vibes then we reunite I swear we had the best times in history Drunk thoughts always thinking bout a mystery Summers coming to an end then your back to school Then the fun stops isn't that just cruel Months go by and the snow starts to fall Quarantine screwed us all we did was call Feelings getting to us it was getting dark That time I really tried to make my mark Minds in a scramble then I'm in shock Last few weeks of twenty one I really felt like just giving up No hope left didn't wanna keep going Didn't see any progress start growing Smoking cigarettes f*ck it back to back Thinking I was having a panic attack I could see it in her eyes asking what's wrong Tell her how I'm feeling she said be strong Sitting at the bar on the verge of tears Lost in my mind I'm tryna think clear The clocks about to strike midnight Thinking my future won't be bright Inspiration hit my head Think about the nice things people said Made a resolution imma make it Once I get the chance you know I'm gonna take it This my story These past nine months have been fucking mind scramble But this shit happened It's not stopping me But I'm making the best out of it You'll get through it I know it Its me I don't know why it's like this I Got bloodstains on my mattress I'm Steady thinking what my life is I Never wanna grow up f*ck the system Moved from my hometown god I miss them Heart break from the past and I'm still broken Sipping on this Jack and now I'm choking Burn a hole in my lungs from smoking Uh From what I'm smoking Uh My mental states not at it's peak On too many pills yeah I can't speak This is my story I said what needs to be said Now here's something to play on my deathbed