MAMA'S WISHES

Pray for a day to make a way so I don't feel the same Why do you coin all these cliches, man, it's just a game Bought some new flowers in exchange, she let me disobey In lamence say, misunderstanding, just a different game My mama wishes that one day I be closer to God A lot of drama, marijuana, stirring up the pot As you can tell, my mother never liked my smoking days Still in a haze, I never claimed to be the purest saint Easier said than done, I pushed my problems onto others, it was never fun I lost my friends and simultaneously lost my mind Shit in the end, I guess I thought it was an easy find I guess that's life though, you know that every now and then She asks me, how you're doing, I tell her, you've been living fine And I ain't overdo it, but frankly I don't really know just how you've truly been I'm foolish saying it's my fault but we both stooped in sin I ushered blame onto myself for things I couldn't change Arranging space and time inside these rhymes I redesigned This life is mine but truly looking past the time A bastard deep inside my mind Defined by cruel intentions, who'd have guessed it but They fester deep within, I paid my dues but shit I'm still condemned You know I knew that you were special while we were still friends See now or later it all catches up as I intend Tell you the story of my life but never told the end I'm hoping one day I can find myself a different route End it however as my mama wanted figured out I disappointed her already once more than enough Pray for her mental shit is strong but mine was never tough Imagine fighting through the struggles so I see my dreams She loved her son so much I gave it back all endlessly I hope my actions still reflect what's going on inside My mind is sharper than a sword cause I could never lie You know she gave me all she had and I'm still grateful for the time and work Our food on top of a table is a fable to behold You know this love is from a mother not a brother not a father not a wife I couldn't front I miss my sister never met her but I know she'd love my mother like I do I pour my heart over these loops and put my ass inside a coupe now I thank my parents for the life I live They told me take all that is yours but don't forget to give The blade inside my side remember that I never miss And when it's never said and done I'll blow my girl a kiss For the finale make perfection in it's purest form Cause in the end it's all I have this art I will perform It's what she wanted shit I wanna make my sister shout She looking down and saying brother make our mama proud