Long Vacation

I am a whirlwind of complication Sweating it out on a long vacation Riding the waves of the conversation Taking it hard but at least I'm taking it I haven't wanted to stay in a long time She makes me feel like I'm losing the daylight Smothers my face with the pillow I pretend to die Never so good at leaving the past all behind Alright I'm taking notes from the looking glass I see myself in myself in a stupid mask I watch my face move a split second after I do I've lost my appetite, but I'll take one more bite I'm short stacked, but I wanna play To run amok, not give a f*ck what other people say I can't believe all the shit that I put into myself To only feel alright but I never get it right One time a guy pointed a gun at me Give me your wallet and your phone, give me everything I looked him straight in the face and I told him to kill me He walked away I'm the most self hating person you know But I'll fight anybody here, how's that for ego Yea I'm the worst but I'm the best it just depends on the day Today I'm ok I'm ok It's just me I'm ok