Start Over

Long night The city sleeps beside me It's almost peaceful, save for freaks And last-call retreats to quell the beast What'll it be Soft lights Dizzy down the side street Sensory feast Translated electrical speech Cacophony of man versus machine Do you remember when Something made you feel this good Artificial and conditional Designer medicinals Discipline implodes Glossed eyes I stumble through your neighborhood Disciple or despicable Habits inhibit the ritual I missed you though So what's the point of living open hearted What's the point of sharing what you've got when Something's lost in you and you can't find it You can run but you can't hide this And what's it mean to lead a life you're hating What's it mean to want to change your framing And it is worth it all to just start over Just start over Just start over Closing shift, her phone was lit Couldn't focus, the notifications raging She anxious pacing Took a break after the final wave of patrons Her response, she workshopped with a coworker Best way to say that things can go no further Tough sell She'd been through enough hell Mislabeled it a rough spell And told herself countless times The bullshit just how love smell She out back smoking Staring at three dots in a bubble That keep popping up then vanishing Psychologically damaging When she goes back in the manager's like That was supposed to be a smoke break not a second lunch Put your phone away and get this mess cleaned up She feeling disrespected thinking F*ck this job, f*ck this place She gets home, stuffs her bags And walks to where some busses wait Now she on a greyhound, with a few hours to simmer In that same text thread where it ends with delivered Trying to walk it back like Sorry, work drama just had me in a shitty mood I'm on the bus and I'll be in the city soon Can I see you So what's the point of living open hearted What's the point of sharing what you've got when Something's lost in you and you can't find it You can run but you can't hide this And what's it mean to lead a life you're hating What's it mean to want to change your framing And it is worth it all to just start over Just start over Just start over And as I look at where I've come Disoriented 'cause The story ended as it began A palindrome, an orbit rendered No more pretending I know there's work still to be done Miles away from where my mind is safe Can't find my place, no bookmark Look hard as what bind these pages If I give my peace, where does it land Fly free my stoic pride Prone to nose-diving Just this once, don't deny me I hope to hold it finally A grateful something in my hand In my hand In my hand In my hand So what's the point of living open hearted What's the point of sharing what you've got when Something's lost in you and you can't find it You can run but you can't hide this And what's it mean to lead a life you're hating What's it mean to want to change your framing And it is worth it all to just start over Just start over Just start over