A Call From a Friend (Skit)

Pick up the phone, Cody, please I am tired of leaving you messages And you only answer the ones that are yes-men messages, where I'm like Oh my God, that song was amazing! Blah, blah, blah You hired me on as co-executive supervising producer or whatever because I funded a big chunk of this album Stop calling it an album, by the way. It's an EP, okay This is not a studio album, okay You recorded this on a cheap microphone that I bought you at home, okay There's background noise in the songs But the songs are written well, except I'm trying to talk to you about Incel Did you write that in 10 minutes? It feels like you're so full of yourself now that you think anything you write is just the Midas touch It's golden drop-a-lets, you know Like, what? Little boy, little boy, little boy, run I'm terrified Okay, that song belongs in a trailer to some shitty horror movie like a remake from a '70's horror movie that nobody watched in the first place And congratulations, you've written the theme song to a movie that I hope never exists It sucks Alright, nothing in that song even rhymes, like, except for run and gun But I don't know, it's just.. You're trying to evoke some imagery of an angry incel But it's just, it feels like you shat it out But I'm getting a little sick of you treating me like you did when you were on drugs Have you relapsed or something? Do you remember that one time I loaned you a chunk of money The day your son was born because you said Oh, I spent all my money on diapers, I need to get something to eat? So I CashApped you some money, or however And you went, and you spent it on drugs and abandoned your son for a year You're a piece of shit, Cody Okay? You're an asshole I thought you were better, okay Why don't you take your sobriety chip and throw it in the garbage? Call me back. Please I'm trying not to get angry Ooh, goddammit