Jacob from the Bible

Mama, don't worry It took me years To say I'm sorry To see your tears Mama, forgive me I grew up too fast But it's not on you It's in the past You're not wrong I might be strong But I'm no Jacob from the bible My first lover Shared my name My holy secrets of enabled cain I thought I loved him Maybe I did But I was so young then Could've called me a kid Was I wrong For feeling so strong? He's no Jacob from the bible But damn, he made me pray He might be the only rival Holding me that way Mama, help me understand I don't wanna be held down by a heavenly man Mama, help me carry on They call me wrong You call me strong But I'm not Jacob from the bible I'm not even on the page Just a lifelong disciple Of loving you that way