M.T.A.F. (Message to All Friends)

I'm sayin' sorry if I've ever acted up, which I've done And I'm sorry for the nights I didn't stop 'till there was none I apologize, I'm tryna find the words to make it right And I'd be lyin' if I told you that without you I'd be fine - cuz I'm not I'd like to start by sayin' this I'm not about to come at y'all with lame excuses But I'd like to put perspective on abuses of my human Talkin' 'bout the shit that's ruined every way I see so many fuckin' things I feel like Truman Upon further review, I took the time looking into myself It helped, and now I'm seein' right through Shoutout my crew, I'm missin' you dudes, you know I had to renew Cuz all y'all knew that I was dying and it almost came true I think it started back when I was just a junior Pass class using humor, even baby boomers Come to think of it I am remembering this rumor from middle school My best friend started whom over time turned out to be a malignant tumor Wish I knew sooner A piece of shit in every sense from straight out of the sewer OK, that topic's over with, save it for another spit Don't get me started on the bitch we both have shit in common with I'm sayin' sorry if I've ever acted up, which I've done And I'm sorry for the nights I didn't stop 'till there was none I apologize, I'm tryna find the words to make it right And I'd be lyin' if I told you that without you I'd be fine - cuz I'm not I'll save it for later, but let's just say once we were done he broke the code and promptly went right on to date her That's when I started getting faded, I was drifting away Seemed like the only escape, act like my life was in shape - nope! When it wasn't, drinkin' bottle after bottle And forgetting I had mushrooms, I was actin' so disgusting And worst part is that I knew it, but I numbed myself Cuz I'd been goin' through it, I'm a loser, yeah, I'm stupid When it came to chicks, already told you briefly 'bout the first But god damn, it got worse I'd need like 600 more verses to explain to you this curse All of the reason for this hurt, there's not a nurse that can define it Or a purse with all the money, cop the click remote, rewind it And now I know that's not the road I wanna go I'm cutting people out my life that want no part of me to grow A simple process, but it's slow, this is my life that I own I'm livin' different 'till they put me 6ft deep below Tryna glow, stack some dough, help the problems of the poor There's shit I gotta do before the day comes that I go But I digress from my flow, only moments ago I'm in a better place, I guess I'll leave it on that note