novacane

Remember being all alone I had to make a way Remember waking up and thinking I can't face today Liquor only made me numb but couldn't take away The pain so using drugs had turned into my novacane Sittin on the couch was watchin cartoons Almost time for school don't wanna argue Got out the shower my mommas phone rang She heard the news fell to her knees sayin the same thing Why why why How am I posed to do this alone Why why why We always talked about how we would grow old Why why why It always felt like maybe you would come home I watched her cry cry cry And held my momma right in my arms I told her Mom your not alone we gotta make a way Everyday we gon get thru it gotta face today And anything you try won't ever take the pain away Sometimes I feel like she still searching for that novacane Mom There's the school pull over I'll get him just wait here Hi I'm looking for my little brother Now my brother just 11 bout to get the message Ran inside told em I'm Kevin our dad went to heaven They called him down before he saw me he was cryin separate Pulled him in my arms and said I love you every second Why why why I knew all of the thoughts in his head Why why why Can't believe our daddy really was dead Why why why Can't even remember what the last I thing I said And we both cry cry cry Leave school and meet mom back in the chev Mom was cryin speedin drivin In the front seat I was ridin On the phone I couldn't get a hold of people I was tryin Slowly my emotions crashin put myself in auto pilot Questioned god he took a soul always had the heart of lion Remember that I got my brothers just a call away Everyday we get a chance to go be somethin great Even without these lemons I'll still make lemonade Sometimes I feel like everybody slowly fade away Older brothers on the bus it's like a hour out When dad was sick they was at school but I was at the house That's one thing I never got to tell em much about Bout the time he almost took my life from actin out Yelled at him no one around to drive me to the store Tried yellin back couldn't understand him But could tell he's soar Pulled my arm got in the car could barely close the door Went in reverse from the garage to street foot on the floor Meantime he screaming hittin me while drivin off the road Life felt like a show and this my final episode Cried in his lap told him I'm sorry please just take control He looked at me tears in his eyes Could barely get ahold Remember that I'm not alone when I'm gon pave the way Remember waking up and being grateful for the day Cuz there's some things this life is probably gonna take away And ain't gon lie I've seen the full effect of novacane