Gone 2

Feels like I'm losing myself Honestly I need somebody to help Nobody helps I'm living in hell Feel like I'm locked and trapped inside a cell I sit and I dwell I scream and I yell Hoping somebody can hear me but they all just fear me and I don't know what to do When I'm just all alone there is no one that is near me Where Do I just go Imagine living in a house that's not home I'm all alone Feeling so low Paying a thousand dollars for a phone That nobody texts I am a mess Feel more together when I am depressed I just confess I could confess But honestly I feel like I would impress All my emotions that I have been holding They're telling me I should just live in the moment But what is a moment When everyday that you get up and breathe you feel like you are just coping With something that's never ever gonna notice You'll never notice All of the feelings that I trap inside of a door that is locked and I just keep on having to Close it Love Where is the love Honestly I feel like this is too much Nobody knows that I'm trapped in a rut Taking a blade and I feel myself cut Open my skin Feels like a pin Hate the fact that I have done this again I'll make amends I'll make amends Depression's defeated me I'll never win I'll never win I'll always lose Why does it feel like that I have to choose Between loving me and hating you I don't know what else I'm suppose to do I feel like that my sky is turning blue Then you remind me that that isn't true That isn't true everything's grey I don't think the storm is going away I feel the rain inside my heart I remember living inside a car While my moms across the country living with a man who's bank account is very large Is this the end should I get revenge Spilling my heart and my soul with this pen They say it's pretend and I'm on the edge I think that I'm going to jump off the ledge Maybe I'll fall to the bottom the bottom is somewhere that I am just destined to be Abandonment issues got me feeling like finding love is just something that isn't for me It isn't for me there's no in between I blame you for that happening to me Relationships failing cause trauma I haven't been dealing with momma how come you Would leave And not say goodbye I sat there and cried Was left in the dark I needed your light You cannot define Being a parent cause parents wouldn't leave a child behind A child behind was left in the dark I need your love I'm losing my spark I need a hug when I fell apart You wasn't there I'm feeling lost A child behind was left in the dark I need your love I'm losing my spark I need a hug when I fell apart You wasn't there I'm feeling lost A child behind was left in the dark I need your love I'm losing my spark I need a hug when I fell apart You wasn't there now I am gone